Since my mum allow me to crap my thoughts out, I shall.

What I read from my friend's blog, I totally agree. Love is a weird game... you like him, he like her, you hate her, he hate you. All this will just bring you back to step one. You will start forming a love triangle/rectangle/hexagon/pentagon etc. It is like I said, it is endless. We can't stop loving, everyone has to love, it is human instinct. It's chance, like a Snake & Ladders. Either go all the way to the finishing end or move all the way back to the start, using the dice as the guide to move that number of steps. Too fast and all the way down you go. Too slow and you get beaten to it. You still have to continue going right? no matter what. Now I'm MIA, stuck, not knowing what to do. I have fall all the way down to out of the game. I want to be friends, but talking to you feels awkward. I want to open my mouth to you, but looking at you reminds me the the incident before... It's heat-breaking like you said. How to get back... I'm trying slowly, but I do not know how long it might take for that to happen, I can't keep my mind off this, I don't know why. Having feelings truly hurt, but it to can heal your wounds. Have no feelings might have it's advantages, as well as disadvantages. I want to be friends, but if I can't even say a word to you. I want to forgive, I can do that. I want to forget, but I'm not sure if that is possible. But there is always a chance in infinity. We might have the same thoughts about this, but we are totally different people. The feelings I have is the same as before, and the feelings you had before is coming back into your life. Change, it is a weird thing. We can never fully change, cause part of it is some where deep down in that we call a heart. Maybe it was me who trigger the memory of that you are having now. If it was, I'm sorry. Mistakes were made, and I wish time would turn back, we all wish for that. It was foolish, careless and a real idiot in believing that you would like me. Life is cruel isn't it? I got shot down by myself... I wish there is something to make this feeling go away. Even if there was, fragments of it will be left within it. This feeling can never go away, it will live on till the day I die... but I got to thank you for something, after that incident, it somehow made me feel more of a better person, just a small bit. I don't know how. It was just a small blessing in disguise...

Drugs, it is a pain-killer to a broken heart, after it wears off, the pain comes back